How I went from the lonely tomboy with girly-girl tendencies to a successful, strong, independent woman with one hell of a man!
Before there was a strong, confident woman with great men lining up to meet her (and no-shame indulging in great food on first dates)… Before finding the love of her life… Before fantastic sex… there was the lonely tomboy with girly-girl tendencies.
Tough as nails. Trying to outsmart the game of love. Afraid to let someone in for even a second because she was sure they would break her heart and waste her time, even though her secret theme song was Lovefool by The Cardigans.
I don’t need a man to feel happy. I can beat the game of love because I’m going to be here for me. On the surface, I lived this great life—I had a booming business, I was fit, I was social—but all of the amazing things I was doing weren’t actually for me.
I was distracting myself from my reality that quality men didn’t want me.
Truth be told, I dated… a lot. And I really wasn’t a tomboy (Back then I thought I had to call myself that to make it acceptable that I was a strong woman and a go-getter… I mean, I could literally lift more weight than half the men I knew). But I was so overloaded with fears and self-doubts that I completely self-sabotaged.
Men are too intimidated by me (and my success!)
All of my friends are married, what’s wrong with me?
What if finding love means I lose my independence?
I dated with the pretense that it would never amount to anything of substance, or that I had to be someone I wasn’t to make anything happen.
Bottom line—I didn’t think I was enough.
I finally reached the point where I had it. I was done pretending I didn’t desire a relationship. I wanted to love someone and be loved back. I wanted a life partner. But I wanted someone who was going to respect me and cherish me, for all of me. And that’s when I realized that the key to finding love has nothing to do with trying to figure men out. It had everything to do with figuring ME out!
I had to rewire the stories I created around dating and men, and I had to build my romantic courage so I could go out into the dating world as myself and create the most incredible dating experiences on my own terms. Once I did that, everything changed:
I created boundaries and figured out what I wanted and didn’t want (Especially around sex and sexuality!).
I was able to see the bigger picture of how I behave when I’m in my element with a man and when I get triggered and turn into a doormat.
I discovered how to be vulnerable without being taken advantage of. The more I learned about myself, the more I was able to create the change I wanted to cultivate the relationship I knew I deserved.
The more I learned about myself, the more I was able to create the change I wanted to cultivate the relationship I knew I deserved.
Before I knew it, I was going out on dates with hugely successful, hot, sexy, incredible men. It got to a point where I had 4 dates marked on my calendar…in one week! And I felt amazing—more than amazing—because I was me. I was having fun, I was unfiltered, and I didn’t care whether or not it worked out with this one person because I knew I was on the right track.
Fast forward to today and I am in the best relationship I could have ever asked for.
It wasn’t an instant spark like what we all expect it to be (I legitimately thought he was weird). We became friends, until one day, it transformed into something much more.
I had discovered a concrete process that not only helped me create fantastic relationships, but helped me create a fantastic life. And I knew I had to share this with as many women as I could. I wanted other women to find love like I did, but without all the hassle and time wasted. So I began speaking and coaching women from all over the world through their journey to finding their Mr. Right.
Relationships come in all shapes and sizes, but to find that deep, passionate love that makes a relationship truly magnetic and lasting— that starts right here. Right now. With you.
The journey takes work. It can be fun, challenging, and terrifying all at the same time. But if I can do it, so can you.